


The Mattress King

by ladyofdecember



Category: Workaholics (TV)
Genre: Best Friends, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Some Drug Use, This is a ship fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-28
Updated: 2017-01-28
Packaged: 2018-09-20 12:16:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9490661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyofdecember/pseuds/ladyofdecember
Summary: The three best friends get a king size mattress and hilarity ensues. Anders likes to feel in charge and thus the king will be going in his room.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I have always loved this show and with it now ending soon, I am still baffled that no one else seems to ship these guys. I mean, what show are you watching that you don't get that they love each other very, very much? These guys care for one another and their love knows no bounds. I wrote this because I'm tired of no one (except for maybe a handful of others) shipping the three as they were intended to be. So here is my attempt at a cute little episode.

Anders stretched, extending his arms out every which way until he felt the delicious snap. One glance to his surroundings and it was clear, the reason for his aches and pains. 

He carefully got up, untangling himself from his friend's arms and legs and trying not to wake them up. Adam and Blake were both lying on their stomachs, half under the covers and half not. Adam was shirtless, of course whereas Blake was wearing a flannel PJ set.

They had all fallen asleep together again, this time piled high atop of Blake's twin sized bed. Anders smiled at the two of them, blissfully unaware of his watch as they slept. After a moment, he stumbled out of the room and headed towards the kitchen.

It was maybe twenty minutes later when the two shuffled in sleepily, each grabbing their own bowls for cereal. 

“Okay, real talk? We cannot keep piling into the same tiny bed each night.” Ders complained, mouthful of cereal.

“I agree! So I think we're all thinkin' the same thing... we move to my room instead!” Adam announced cheerfully, pouring some cheerios.

Blake's eyes nearly shut as he struggled to get his mind to come online, the man shook a Lucky Charms box at the two of them. “There's nothin' wrong with my bed! What's wrong with sleeping in there?”

“Um, for starters, it's a twin, Blake! And... I'm a very tall man, I'm sure you're aware.”

Adam nodded along with Anders as he began eating the cheerios straight out of his bowl sans milk. 

Anders continued. “And secondly, and most importantly, your room smells... like ass. Like really raunchy, gross ass. I don't know what died in there but my god man, I cannot keep waking up like that.”

He set down his now empty cereal bowl to rub at his aching neck. “We have to get a king size bed. My neck is killing me!”

Adam began jumping up and down excitedly. “Yes, dude! I know exactly what you mean. So, we'll pull all our money together and get a king size bed we can all sleep in. And best of all, it'll be in my room! Yes! Bring it in guys! On three!”

He threw his hand in the middle of them for some sort of cheer, glancing confusedly at the two when neither moved. Blake was pouting as he leaned against the counter top and Anders just stared disdainfully at him.

“What? No! First of all, you have no money Adam so when you say pull all “our money” together, you just mean me and Blake. Second, I meant the king size bed should go in my bedroom, of course!”

Blake cocked an eyebrow, clearly still hurt from Anders' comments. “Oh really? And why, oh king Anders, would it be going in your room?”

“Because, I have the largest room. Uh, duh! Your tiny rooms won't even fit a king size, let alone a queen! And also, and I'm loathe to point this out but you're makin' me, you're both gross. Your rooms are gross.”

The two sputtered indignantly as Anders spun around to begin rinsing his bowl and spoon in the sink.

Adam laughed as he stepped towards the taller man, abandoning his bowl on the counter as Blake joined in on the chuckling. “Look, we both know this is just Anders needing to feel like he's “in control” and “in charge” or whatever. So, let's just let Anders think that for a while and then me and you, we'll go get a bed... for my room.”

Blake glared, brushing some of his locks of hair out of his eyes. “Why does it need to go in your room? We spend most nights in my room!”

“No, we don't!” Adam argued.

Anders spun around. “Quiet! Look, I don't need to feel “in charge”, I am in charge of this household! We're getting the king bed for my room! End of discussion!”

The two shorter men watched him march out of the kitchen, with looks of shock on their faces. 

“Wow, uh... Mr. Groucho Cucamonga over here!” Adam said, laughing.

“Yeah, what crawled into his grape nuts?”

“I don't know dude. But look, let's not fight. My room, your room, who cares whose room the new bed goes into? What I know is, we can't let Ders win, right?”

“Right!”

“Okay, so we've gotta team up to win him over. And I got an idea.” The brunette whispered conspiratorially. 

…

“Yes sir, I absolutely agree. You know, kids these days, they got no respect for their elders. They don't follow rules, they just run all over your lawn like-” Anders glanced up from his computer screen, suddenly distracted by Adam, dressed head to toe in some sort of football outfit.

He shook his head, grabbing his headset in disbelief. “I'm sorry sir, I'll have to call you back.” He punched the disconnect button on his phone, forgetting entirely about his steak knife pitch. “What the hell are you wearing?”

Adam began to laugh maniacally, drawing attention from their nearby co-workers except for Blake, who was busy at his computer. “Well, Ders, I thought we'd have a friendly little competition to decide who will be the winner of the ultimate mattress contest. You see, I've done some research. That's right, I have and you'll be sorely mistaken if you think you can beat me in a game of football.”

“Okay, Adam, well did you know that you need more than two people to play football?”

“Yes... that's why Blake here-” He gestured at the man, still engrossed in his screen. “Blake! Why aren't you dressed?”

“Huh?” The long haired man called over his shoulder. “Oh, uh sorry, I got distracted by this pop up ad. Did you know Lay's is looking for a new potato chip flavor?” He grinned excitedly.

Anders rolled his eyes and stood up to place both hands on Adam's shoulders. “Look, I'm not trying to be mean or some sort of bad guy. I just want a bigger bed, okay? Don't get me wrong, I love sleeping with-”

He blinked and glanced around their small office space, realizing Waymond was still listening to them. He cleared his throat and lower his voice, bringing an arm around Adam's shoulders to bring him in closer to whisper. “I love sleeping with you guys at night and cuddling and... you know, how we do! But, I cannot, cannot keep doing that in a tiny ass bed meant for a teenager!”

Blake stood up, joining in on the conversation. “I'm in. You're absolutely right, it's time we got a bigger bed and if you want it in your room, that's fine. I mean, who care whose room it's in when we're all gonna sleep in it?”

“That's right! That's right! You know, unless I end up wanting some alone time from you two or somethin' because, let's face it, you can be really fuckin' annoying!” Anders laughed to himself at the joke that neither got.

He quieted once they began glaring at him. “Well, uh, shall we go mattress shopping?”

…

“So, I guess that's all I would be concerned with really. Just... the durability when it comes to jumping, like rapid jumping, repetitive and often.” 

The salesman stared at Blake, eyebrow cocked in confusion. “Um, I'm not really sure. It's a mattress so it's very durable when it comes to holding up against the weight of people. I don't think it's been tested against adult men jumping on it.”

“Oh, well that's just something we need to know, my good man! Why don't you go find out, huh?” Blake chuckled, patting the balding man on the back and watching as he hurried away from him.

He turned and searched the store for his friends, grinning when he laid eyes on them. Anders was currently laying on one of the floor models, testing the firmness whereas Adam was doing flips and jumping jacks on another.

“Alright, man! This one's a winner! Huh? Right?” He called down to him.

“Yeah! Lookin' good!” Blake nodded.

“Would you two quiet down? You look like fools!” Anders scolded, laying completely still, with his arms crossed over each shoulder.

“We look silly? You look like a mummy, dude!” Adam said, jumping down to the floor with a grin.

“I am testing the durability of the mattress. This is how I sleep.”

“That's not how you sleep, buddy.”

Blake shook his head. “No, no. You totally sleep like this.” And he proceeded to climb on the bed as well, ending up on his stomach, with his leg halfway off the edge.

Anders sat up in a huff. “Please, I am an adult. I am dignified. I know how to sleep.”

Adam pointed at Blake. “No, that's totally what you do. You also drool all over my hair, it's disgusting man.”

“What?! Shut up! Look, let's just pick a mattress, shall we?!”

The same salesman from before approached them, looking more and more worried the longer the three of them remained in the store. “Look, I asked around but no one knows really what the durability is going to be against an adult man jumping up and down. My guess is, it wouldn't bode well so maybe don't do that?”

Blake chuckled condescendingly. “Frank, my dear Frank... can I call you Frank?”

“My name is Gordon.”

“Great, well Frank, if we had a choice to jump or not to jump, why oh why would we ever choose not to jump? That's just crazy!”

The man looked helplessly over his shoulder at Anders and Adam. The norwegian man patted him on the back as he walked around to face the two. “Alright, alright now, let's not upset the man. Sir, we have made our decision! We would like this mattress right here!”

Adam began jumping up and down excitedly again. “Yeah! Wrap it up!”

Blake smiled and let go of the man who looked uneasily at the three of them. “Well, alright... uh, but this mattress is $6300.”

Adam's smile dropped from his face as Anders and Blake stared open mouthed at him.

“So, we'll be taking that... that king over there, yes? That one for $700 then, yes?” Anders pointed at a more basic model in the corner of the showroom.

“Yeah.” Blake nodded solemnly as the sales man went off to set it up.

…

Blake was puffing on the last bit of his blunt, pleasantly amused by Adam's galloping around the living room while in the background an episode of The Flintstones played quietly.

Anders entered the living room, drying his still damp hair with a towel, fresh from the shower. “Hey, what are you idiots doing?”

“Blazin' it up!” Adam screeched happily, running in circles until he tripped over the edge of the couch and fell flat on his face.

Blake laughed, holding up his blunt to the man. “Hey, you want to finish this?”

“Yeah, man. Obviously!” Anders said, grabbing the last few hits of it before putting it out in the ashtray nearby. “You okay buddy?”

“Yeah, I'm golden, like you already know!” Adam mumbled as he slowly got up and back to his feet. He pouted when neither man said anything more.

“Alright, well I'm goin' to bed. It's like 12:30.”

“Oh wah! It's midnight! I'm Anders and I'm seventy!” 

“Adam, we have work in like seven hours.”

“Wah!” Adam began to fake cry at him, laughing when the man turned and headed back to his bedroom.

Blake stood unsteadily to his feet, patting the shorter man on the shoulder. “I'm turnin' in too. Take it sleazy.”

“No, wait! Blake! We can stay up some more!” Adam slurred, pouting when the curly haired man continued down the hall. “Blake!”

He reluctantly followed the two down the hall and into Anders' bedroom, finding the blonde already in pajamas and crawling under the covers with Blake who hadn't bothered to change from his loose tank top and swim trunks.

“Gross dude, can't you go put on your PJ's?” Anders complained when he crawled beneath the sheets with him.

“But I'm... so high, Ders.”

“Fine... “

Adam continued standing in the door way with the hall light glaring from behind him. Anders held up his hand to block the light from his face. “Adam! Close the damn door if you're coming to bed! Did you guys even turn off the TV and the lights in there?”

Blake and Adam quickly mumbled an excuse, neither bothering to go back and check. Adam stood staring down at his hands in confusion, his brow pinched together.

“What are you doing Adam?” Anders glared.

“I'm... bleedin'.”

“What?!”

The older man threw off the covers, causing Blake to mumble incoherently into his pillow.

He flipped on the light overhead to look at Adam's hands as well. They were covered in long trails of blood, dripping from his finger tips. “Oh my god!”

Blake sat up, rubbing his eyes. “What?”

“I need some bandaids and towels!” Anders shouted before rushing out of the room.

Adam blinked slowly at his curly haired friend as he approached him, both still feeling pretty buzzed and high from the beers and blunt they shared.

Anders returned quickly with said bandages, swatting at Adam's hand when he tried to interfere. “I can't believe you Adam. How did this happen?”

“I dunno... “ He slurred, grinning. “Maybe it was when that bird was in the window? And then I threw my beer bottle at the window but it hit the wall instead. It broke.” He began to laugh, earning a grin from Blake.

Anders glared at the man. “Hey, can you help me here?! He's really bleeding!”

“Oh yeah, sorry.” Blake mumbled, beginning to wipe some of the blood off with the damp washcloth he had.

“Ow! Guys, ow!”

“Well, stop cutting your damn hands and it wouldn't hurt, idiot!”

“Anders, I... “ Adam began to sob.

“Jesus, you're high as shit.” Anders shook his head, trying to be more careful at wrapping the tiny bandages over his finger tips.

Blake rubbed his bath soothingly as Anders finished wrapping his hand up, earning a small smile from Adam.

“Now go lay down, for god sakes!” The blonde commanded, watching until the smaller man climbed beneath the new blankets and sheets. “And shoes and socks off!”

Blake helped him pull off his converse and throw them in the corner of the bedroom. Anders flipped off the hall light and then doubled back to the living room to turn off the television and lights. He rolled his eyes at the forgetfulness of his friends.

Flipping off the light switch, he finally climbed back beneath the warm covers that they'd picked out at the store that day. He'd been especially particular about the quality of the softness of them and he was happy with his choice now that it was time for bed.

Adam had been squished down into the middle of the large bed now flanked by Blake and Ders. He bit his lip as he lay on his back just staring up at the popcorn and glitter covered ceiling. “Hey guys?”

Blake was on his side, eyes shut and both hands under his head securely, possibly already asleep. Anders, eyes wide open, turned to roll onto his left side to face him. “Yeah buddy?”

“I really love you guys.” 

Blake opened his eyes to look at Adam's strangely peaceful face. He smiled at him.

Anders let his hand drift up to lovingly stroke his cheek until he turned to look at him. “I love you too buddy.”

Blake brought an arm over his chest to bring him in closer before reaching out further to grip at Anders' shirt. “I love you both.”

Adam grinned, sandwiched by the two men and feeling warm and content. He closed his eyes as the others did, drifting into a peaceful sleep.


End file.
